smoking helps....really it does!!?! you believe that??

standing in the cold, sipping on my chocolate milk and smoking my life away...i thought "whos been the most influential people i know, and in my life?" good or bad. they did influence.

back in my room. wrapped up in my blanket.
hendrix is playin

so people walk into our lives to
- change our belief systems
- question our motives
- ruin our lives (rise from the ashes to either seek retribution or learn to be wary)
bad company playin now {i like my new play list}
- better them
- help us see. we are blind and deaf most of us
black crowes playin now

i have learned from my father. the man is a very hard worker. will not miss a day of work unless he cant get out of bed. work hard and straight.

i have learned from my mother. to forgive(it took me all of 32 years to do that). observing my mother i have actually learnt a lot about how a woman operates. me thinks my sisters and their friends also helped there. {i may not necessarily exhibit, play dumb and learn more}. my mother is a very strong woman, she may not realise, but for a woman to go thru what shes been thru since she was a child and then to raise us. respect man! absolute!! if ever the term one man army applied...this is it. stand your ground, take up the challenge and fight. even if youre alone. your strength lies in the simple fact that you are able to achieve.
lynyrd skynyrd playin now

i have learned from sister carmen mary. she taught me when i was in fourth grade. its a wonder i still have my ears. she always pulled them real hard. i think the real lesson was not in the new words she gave us everyday but the very exercise. challenge the new and gain!
motherlove bone playin now

i have learned from mrs. mathulla. she taught me when i was in 9th and 10th grade. a friend and me once got into trouble. for a crime we did not commit. he came over to my place and told me about the problem. we left immediately to mrs. mathulla's place. had to have our names cleared. what surprised us - she knew we didnt do it. and she spoke to us for a very long time. and that day she asked a question(which i think was pivotal in the shaping of our lives then) it made us think and we moved to a different line of reasoning. {RK, dude, i knocked on on your door when all these years you were seeking mine}. and damn i shouldnt have taken my mother to the PTA!!
wishbone ash playin now

i recall meeting this person in a pub and all he said was "there is no such thing as luck, only perseverance". there was MG and she once told me "get to where to you have to. even if it means you only have a dollar left in your pocket". the GM of a company "what are you without the brand name?". that guy "take me to your parents. they need to know what their son is doing with my daughter!" {lol, it is funny now, not back then}. VR, in front of class,"the hardest working person this semester has been <"ahem"> ra" {that was a bit face reddening}.
candlebox playin now

there were others things said, but for now i choose only these.

i have learned from my previous relationships you cannot trust, regardless of the situation. i have given chances, have to take into account human nature. results have more or less swayed the same pitch.
pearl jam playin now

perhaps some of the biggest influences since i was a child - music and books. the books went away, they will be back soon. not having too many friends has its +s.

when i finally grow up i wanna be wayne rainey.