sip sip, and i have a new....?

i made new memories. xmas eve. i made new memories.
i did.


oh yeah, gonna try n make eggnog, i finally have everything i need. oh wait, im missing the victims.hm. by victims i mean connoisseurs. hmm, those wont be hard to find.

its just a matter of hours and theres 365 potential disasters looming. in my line of work make that 6 million, what say miran?

disasters aside, life has been very good lately except at work which has been 'rather mundane'(so british....so brhi-ish). i discovered a bit of peace, somebody made me realise being a monster is not so necessary and most importantly the wall might not actually be as impregnable as i thought.

theres been so much happenin and at the same there isnt much to talk about.

gonna try, this weekend im gonna pick up a book and read. havent done anything of the sort for such a long time. but i will try.

and yeah, f*** off, i am a nerd. head banging nerd.

make or break? make. made.

so i cud let myself out

kickin n screamin, and there never was any reason.

the mirror shrieked.

13 hours of binging. hangover from hell. and smiling.

miss u even when im with u. let urself out. im waiting.

He listens.

we are responsible.

u make me happy, even for a few hours.

hi ho silver away

...The one that carries the worlds tragedies alone...

blood on ur lips......next time, duck - u stupid bastard!

blades that cut are blunt

smile

slit that wrist

piss on that fire

nails that scratch the board

currently 14 shots down and i got to work tomorrow.

the gremlins did it

somebody tell me what the hell is jambi?????

slaughtered

devour

the f***** grass was greener because of the landscape artist

kma

i would wish it all away

62000000

theres no focus here, is there? read between the lines, cuz it so points.


shoon, miran, curly, stinkhead, jujup, ill see u guys on the other side. God bless and hope ur gonn be as drunk as i am breakin in the new year. the last thing i wanna see is the ceiling, lol.

the 2.5 days bombay stood still

when i begun writing this post all i had in mind was what happened to us last week. i had 60 hours in mind. to me that was blood on OUR hands. we all let it happen to us. we cant blame anybody else. because we are complacent. we are easily subdued, we are always looking to please. we want to do what is right in front of the world because we are what we are. because we are a peaceful people. but peaceful people dont have to compromise to fit into a global society. the very same society that treats us like we are a spill over. there is no real reason for tears to fall, the fact is we are just pretense. always lions at home. we will attack our own, kill our own. murder our own for reasons political, for reasons that defy moral thought patterns. but when we are attacked, when we are slaughtered by outsiders, we cry out to the very same we killed(read very carefully and understand).

in a way we deserve what has happened to us. we have provided. the outsiders sought this and we gave into them. we cant ever unite because our puppeteers wont relinquish. we are willing to be brainwashed. we are a SCARED lot, we are. the pillars are but a few. and we will interview their families and write posts on how this has shocked us and disgusted us.

let me make this clear, if the enemy is involved (and there are indications) - we must declare war and FINISH THIS. and if you think violence is not the way, tell this to the families who lost their own.



what follows is what i wanted to post initially.

a couple of evenings back, i was walking around. for once relaxed and not the usual "get-rid-of-the-agitation" walk. and i saw:

(this was in a store) a man clippin his nails and after being politely told by the attendant to not do that, answered back real rude like that he was going to buy the nail clippers.{and and whos gonna buy your nails?}

a lady that definitely had trouble walkin in those stilettos. but she did it anyway. it made her breasts jiggle. i think that was what she wanted. all male attention and female too, but the latter must have looked with a "is she that desperate?" look or perhaps "i wish i could be like that" look.(ok i didnt really look at her boobies that long, i was lookin at the amount of face paint she had)

the man who stands outside his store ogling at most women who pass by. hes got around 60-70 strands of hair on his head and he does the spiky look thing. really. i first noticed him sometime last year.{loser}{still loser}{makes me feel all bright n sunshiny}{loser}

a woman cryin so bitterly. but lady if u had paid a little more attention in holding hands than shopping u may have not lost your kid.

the new sandwich from hardees is really not bad.
she:"ser, we have new sandwich, do you want to try it?"

me:"ok"{still looking for the biggest combo meal i could find}

she:"meal, ser?"

me:"yes please and no ice with the drinks annnnddd extra salt on my fries please"

she:"woujuliike (she said it like it was one word) to try our curly fries?"

me:"how is that different from your regular fries?"

she then proceeds to get me a "sample" of curly fries. and it tastes different. its coated with spices or something of the sort before getting dunked i suppose.

me:"ok, ill have those. how much?"

she:"ser, blah blah KD"

me:"here u go"

she:"ill get it to your table"

me:"ok great. thanks"

she:"this is ALLLL new"

me:{this had better not be stuff that some one didnt eat and u decided to pick from their tray}"huh?"

she:"new ser"

me:"whaa..?"

she:"new meal ser"

me:"oh ok. ill be seated over there"

............
............


and i dont feel much like drinking since i began my mini holiday.
the cold is finally here.

sleep eludes. again.

the minds blank.

repelled by lifes polarity

hangover!!! nice term that.....oh well its the weekend, so its fine. ill recover.


finally got my little project done(but thats only part one of two). it took a while. and tho im not really happy with it, the bosses liked it. congratulations et al. said it will "increase my market value", to which i retorted,"it would be better if i get a salary increase", to which he said,"haha", to which i thought,"i wish i had a gun, haha".



some good things have happened this week. and for some strange reason, i didnt really care about some of them. i mean, yeah, theres relief but....priorities have changed. thats a given. ive understood for some years now that wants are just that, wants. but when a need is fulfilled and the feeling to it is numb, was it really a want all this time? nah, cuz, i analysed, then i dissected, then i put it into a jar and added water and shook it(just to see what would happen), then i took it out and squeezed the excess water out of it, then i left it to dry. conclusion - it was a need and i didnt care.



need a vacation. real soon. so in light of that, have a little break comin my way for a few days. no emails, no phones - just me, my liver, and a whole lotta movies. oh yeah some food too. my only hope is that the temperature drops by another 10 degrees by that time. so love winter. there is something so serene about it. and when its gets cloudy with that cold breeze blowing, yeah.....


whats a jambi?

blue skies, pink champagne, yellow fever, black death......yup the colors of life

hmmmmm, whatta week!!

busy busy busy!!! its hard convincing ops your bonus is on the line as well. look my bonus aint much, i mean i cant buy a car(cash down) or a bike. fine, an xbox is easy but whos gonna buy me that huge screen i want and those speakers?

its been a good two weeks on the personal level. things have looked up and i really like just being. and yes the whole world isnt out to get me, only some part of it is {blech}. guess ill have to use the force and make them stew in their own misgivings(read: monkey puke fermenting turd). hardy har har!

and im now as colorful as a rainbow regurgitating a totally unbalanced meal (read: kinda bright). seeing as i gots me some colored tees. not the usual fare namely black, actual variety - no drak greys even. damn think im turning into some sorta flutterby now(did u know an angry butterfly will chase you for at least a quarter mile). thats not going to stop me from getting a suitcase (i dont own a dresser/cupboard/wardrobe)full of black tees. heck, ive even found a place thats gonna print whatever i want on it. muhahahahaha! er, ahem. yeah. so now i dont have to tell people stuff, ill just point to my tee. being the good boy that i am, i dont intend on printing any obscenities. now that would be just down right, er, obscene(read: they would haul my butt to jail, shave my head)(hmm, i do have a steel cup now, so...). heck i can always mouth off profanity and gesture. i have a bit of know how there(read: i will swear at you till the day u die every chance i get, and yes, even in front of ur kids).

am so looking forward to the new week, for reasons i cannot mention, and work is going to be a challenge absolute (read: its gonna be a bitch).

till whenever.